‘Oh why don’t you grow up?’ Counter-tops sprawled across the floor. ‘Biology Laboratory’ The inscription read and inside were two desperate figures fumbling over a partially torn document.

A husky woman twisted her hair and stuck a pencil in place. ‘Stop covering your mouth and pin his limbs.’

The man wore gray slacks, leather shoes and a white lab apron tied around his waist. ‘Pin him with what Stef?’ The man shrugged his shoulders. ‘There is nothing to pin him with!’

Stef raised the scalpel in her hands to his eyes. ‘With a pin of course!’ She shook her head. ‘Sometimes I don’t know why I even bother with you Mike.’

‘Because I have gorgeous eyes.’ Mike leaned towards Stef and blinked rapidly.

Stef smiled ‘Yes you are cute.’ She ran her hand across Mike’s cheeks. ‘Now pin him down.’

Mike walked to a varnished desk at the end of the room and searched around a model skeleton, charts of the reproductive system, and an enlarged replica of the human eye. ‘Cool’ thought Mike. ‘Stef there are no pins here’

Stef dipped some metal equipment in an alcohol jar. ‘Well check for anything.’ She rolled her hand around her wrist. ‘Even you know, even tape would be fine.’

Mike nodded and opened the drawers. ‘Got it!’ Mike ran over to Stef and wagged a roll of duct-tape in the air.

‘Good set it down.’ Stef doused chloroform into a clean white cloth.

Mike leaned his lips close to Stef’s. ‘No thank you? No Reward?’

‘You haven’t taped him yet?’ Stef thumped her foot on the vinyl floor.

Mike muttered under his breath. ‘Just wanted a little reward.’ Stef looked at Mike at the corner of her eye and smiled.

Mike pulled the duct tape and wrapped the joints of the subject together by the wrists.

Stef looked at the subject and rather than an outstretched dissection sample it looked like a folded paper airplane. Stef frowned. ‘Mike! Can’t you even tape him down properly?’ Stef cut the tape with the scalpel. ‘He needs to be stretched out like the Vitruvian man.’ Stef pointed at the large poster above the chalkboard.

Mike scratched his head. ‘What would you want me do then?’ He pulled a portion of tape from the roll. ‘All we have is tape, not pins!’

Stef dropped the scalpel into the alcohol jar once again.

Mike continued. ‘We have to tie the wrists and ankles together.’

Stef frowned. She knows Mike was right. All she wanted was a textbook dissection. ‘Let’s just tape him to the table ok.’

‘If he starts waking up he can just jump up at us.’ Mike poked at Stef’s lab apron. ‘Would you like his innards smeared all over you?’

‘If he starts waking up I have some chloroform ready.’ Stef picked up the chloroform soaked cloth. ‘Make sure to wear your gloves and mask.’

Mike shrugged his shoulders and taped the limbs of the subject on the edges of the table. He washes his hands and wore the gloves and mask. Stef handed him the chloroform cloth and Mike pressed it against the nostrils of the subject.

‘That’s enough Mike.’

Mike moved aside.

‘Let’s start.’ Stef pulled the scalpel from the alcohol jar and wiped it dry with her lab apron.

‘Listen Stef.’ Mike mumbled through his mask. ‘You need to make light incisions.’

Stef nodded her head.

‘You have to start from the limbs.’ Mike pointed at the paper on the table. ‘Just look at the diagram. It has to meet at the middle and that is where we open him up.’

Stef pointed the scalpel at the upper left limb. She pulled the flesh slightly. The muscles were stretched but they were soft and relaxed. She took a deep breath and pushed the scalpel slowly against the skin.

‘Stop!’ Mike pulled Stef’s hand. ‘You’re going too deep. I told you light incisions.’

Stef’s hands trembled. She could hardly feel the scalpel in her hands. ‘It was a light incision Mike!’

Mike shook his head. ‘No Stef.’ He released her hand. ‘You were about to hit a vein.’

Stef saw a puddle of blood on the table. ‘Oh.’

‘Just cut the skin ok.’

Stef sighed. She pulled the skin again and restarted her incision. Her hand was shaking and she could feel beads of sweat forming on her forehead.

‘Why not I start it off from here and you do the middle part that is more fun anyways.’ Mike grabbed the scalpel from Stef.

Stef stepped aside and took a deep breath. She watched Mike cut the flesh like hot knife through butter. ‘You have done this before haven’t you?’

Mike smiled. The hair at the back of his neck stood up. ‘I told you I had.’ Mike opened up the skin and reached the body of the subject.

‘Yes but you are enjoying this aren’t you?’

‘Maybe.’ He was about to open up the chest and watch the organs beat into life. His mouth salivated. This was Mike’s favourite part. ‘Is that a crime?’

‘I don’t know.’

‘This was your idea you know.’

Stef rubbed her arm. ‘The slimy bastard was peeking under my skirt!’

‘After you walked on him in the garden.’ Mike stopped and turned towards Stef. ‘You practically gave him a free show.’

‘He shouldn’t have been there!’ Stef Crossed her arms. ‘Are you defending the slimeball?’

‘No, nothing like that.’

‘Hmph! Are we ready?’

Mike watched the veins pulsate and was relieved that the subject was still alive. He flipped the scalpel and handed it over to Stef. ‘Your turn.’

Stef slowly lifted the flesh flap over.

‘Don’t open it too much ok.’ Mike guided Stef’s hand. ‘We just need to observe the bodily functions.’

Stef turned the page on the document and looked at a checklist of organs. She pulled out a forceps from the alcohol jar and lifted the loose flesh on the body of the subject.

‘Ok, Stef.’ Mike pointed at the first organ. ‘That is the heart.’

Stef watched a sticky globule contract and relax. She pulled up another flap and the subject was fully exposed.

‘Ok Stef.’ Mike took the scalpel from Stef. ‘Take the probe and look for the liver.’

Stef pulled the probe from the alcohol jar and lightly moved around the beating organs. She glanced at the diagram on her right and slowly moved down.

‘That is the stomach.’

Stef moved the probe sidewards.

‘There that is the liver.’

Stef glanced at the checklist and ticked off every organ that they passed. ‘Is that all?’

Mike smiled. ‘Now is the difficult part.’

Stef withdrew the probe from the body. ‘What?’

Mike held her hand. ‘We have to look at the lungs. Be very careful.

Stef stuttered. ‘Ma, maybe you should do it.’

Mike shook his head. ‘This is your show. You wanted to do this.’

Stef took a deep breath. She stuck the probe deeper and watched as the organs move in unison. These organs were responsible for sustaining the life. ‘Beatiful.’ She whispered. ‘Even for a slimeball.’ Stef peeked closer.

‘Those are the lungs.’

‘Wow!’ Stef sputtered.

‘That is it then Stef.’ Mike released Stef’s hand. ‘Not bad for your first dissection.’

Stef hugged Mike. ‘Thank you.’

Mike rubbed her back. ‘You want me to close him up?’

‘I can do this.’ Stef grabbed a needle and some suture thread. Slowly and surely Stef closed the flaps together.

‘Great were done!’

Mike unfastened his mask and breathed a sigh of relief. The stench of blood hung in the air. He licked his lips and savoured the scent.

‘Eeeeek!’ Stef screamed.’

‘You won’t get away with this!’ The voice was rough as sandpaper. A hand pulled on Stef’s arm.

Stef tried pulled herself free. ‘Please! Please! Mike Help!’

The duct tape had been ripped from the table. ‘I knew we had should have tied up his wrists.’ thought Mike.

‘Professor what is going on here?’ Mike discreetly moved his hand across the table.

‘You!’ The sewn up old man wavered groggily in place. He broke his other wrist free and felt around his chest. ‘What did you bastards do to me?’

Stef was pushing the professor’s hand from her wrist.

‘Nothing sir. We were just doing some night study.’ Mike was searching for the chloroformed cloth. He winced when he realized it was by Stef.

‘Where do I know you boy?’ The Professor leaned against the desk. ‘You are no student of mine.’

‘I have been around your lectures Professor McCullum.’

The Professor turned to Stef. ‘But you!’

Stefs eyes widened. She pulled and pushed harder but Professor McCullum’s grip just tightened more.

He moved closer and pulled Stef’s hair. ‘I know you!’

Mike tackled Professor McCullum against the desk. He grabbed the jar of alcohol and smashed it on Professor McCullum’s head.

Professor McCullum released his grip on Stef and staggered.

Mike grabbed the scalpel on the table and pushed it deep at the side of Professor McCullum’s neck.

Professor McCullum fell on the floor and held his neck as he gargled on his blood.

Stef massaged her wrist. ‘He is pretty strong.’

Mike shrugged. ‘Not strong enough.’ He looked at the puddle of blood on the floor. He removed his lab apron and laid it on the dead professor. ‘We have to clean this up.’

Stef threw her lab apron on the desk and pinned a badge on her blouse. She walked to the door and looked down a narrow corridor. ‘That is your job Mr. Janitor.’ She walked up to Mike. ‘I have to report back to the security desk.’ She planted her hands on Mike’s chest and kissed him lightly on the lips. ‘Thanks for everything.’

‘So when are we going on that date?’

Stef pouted her lips and placed a finger across her cheek and chin. ‘Hmmm…this was a date wasn’t it?’

‘This was a date?’

‘A really good one.’ Stef winked.


‘We should do it again.’ Stef walked out of the room.

Mike’s heart skipped a beat as Stef’s loud footsteps echoed down the empty corridor. ‘Women.’ Mike groaned and turned to the dead body, the image of Stef’s wiggling posterior still flashed in his head. ‘What we do for them eh old man?’

Moments later Mike whistled as he wheeled his cart out the corridor. The room was spotless and Professor McCullum was stuffed in a large plastic can filled with chloroform ready to be picked for tomorrow’s garbage run.


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